When babies are hungry or need attention, they cry. When a parent or caretaker arrives, they reach up to be fed, changed, or soothed. According to Neurolinguistic Programming research, this behavior becomes “anchored” as a positive feeling and is often coupled with the release of the feel-good neurotransmitter, beta endorphin.

Common places where you will see this behavior in adults include cheering when your favorite team scores or dancing with your hands in the air.

To easily tap into this anchor, look up at the ceiling and wave your hands above your head. Due to early conditioning, this body position triggers a release of endorphins in most people. The result is a smile on your face and a much better mood.

Listening to music that makes you want to dance or snap your fingers to the beat, synchronizes the brain waves in your left and right cerebral hemispheres. Hemispheric synchronization has been linked to peak performance, especially for athletes and in sales situations.

Questions 3 and 4 address whether your client’s primary brain modality is visual, auditory, or kinesthetic. About 40 percent of the population is visual, 40 percent is auditory, and 20 percent ise kinesthetic. Answer “a” describes those who are visual, “b” describes those who are auditory, and “c” describes those who are kinesthetic.

It's easy to spot visuals because they are color coordinated, they care more about how they look than how comfortable they are, and usually speak at a more rapid pace. (Note the woman in the picture is perfectly put together with her matching hat and hoodie.) Visuals want light, bright, and a view if possible. They also like soaring ceilings and open floor plans.

As in the previous question, answer “a” describes visuals, “b,” describes those who are auditory, and “c” describes those who are kinesthetic.

The person with the socks and sandals is kinesthetic and cares more about comfort than how they look. When you work with someone who is a kinesthetic, use words that describe feelings such as “warm,” “cozy” and “hunch.” They generally dislike open floor plans and big rooms, preferring smaller, more intimate spaces.

If you have an auditory client (the “b” options in each question), they are attuned to sounds, quiet, and often have a dramatic (radio) voice. Use the words “talk,” “hear,” and “sound.”

In addition to opening drawers, looking in cabinets, touching the walls, and slowing down their pace during the showing, another important buying sign has to do with how the agent treats the brochure. If the buyer has rolled up the brochure and unrolls it to take a second look at it, that’s usually a buying sign.

If there ever was a time to shut up and sell, when you’re in the presence of a “naysayer,” this is it. Your best approach is to explain that your role is to be a “conduit of information.” They are the decision makers, not you.

The second body language tactic is to mirror and match your client’s body language—not the mother’s. In other words, if your client is smiling, you smile. If your client has a serious look on his face, mirror his serious look. Unless the son has a poor relationship with his mother (i.e., there is open hostility,) mirroring her son’s body language will make her feel that you and her son are on the same wavelength.

This is a case where the “toes have it.” If your client’s toes are pointing toward you, they are with you emotionally. The woman in the picture is smiling at the agent and her toes are pointing toward him. This body language signal usually means she will be doing business with him.

Looking to the left indicates truth-telling in this person. Approximately 90 percent of the population is left brain dominant for language. This means when they look to the left, they are telling the truth or recalling an actual memory. Looking right means they are not telling the truth or basing what they’re saying on an actual memory.

To recognize the other 10 percent of the population who are right brain dominant for language and look left when they are lying, look at how they hold a pen or pencil when they write. Here’s how to tell:

• If the person is left-handed but doesn’t “hook” their hand around like most left-handed people do, (i.e., they write like someone who is right-handed), they are right brain dominant for language. (If they are left handed and “hook,” they are in the 90 percent who are left brain dominant for language>)

• They are right-handed, but “hook” and write like someone who is left-handed. (Males who have this trait often have extreme difficulty learning to read and may be ADHD as well.)

When your client raises one of their eyebrows, they don’t believe you.

When buyers touch their face or lips and are also looking down, it means they’re thinking about it. Again, this is a time where silence is your friend. Wait for them to comment, no matter how uncomfortable it may be for you. This way you avoid pushing them and allow them to come to their own decision.

When you work with buyers who do not speak English as their first language, relying on verbal cues can be difficult. Most agents don’t realize that when their clients step away and begin an animated conversation in their own language, they’re not being rude. Instead, they’re usually talking about writing an offer.

A handshake where one person places their hand on top of the other person’s hand, as shown in this photo, is a way of indicating they are the dominant person in the relationship. In other words, it’s a power play.

The correct way to shake hands is where each individual has their hands side-to-side, not one person with their hand on top of the other person’s hand.